Ah, almost as quickly as Marion Jones and Tim Montgomery have become drug free, the Olympic Trials have come and gone. While some people were at the top of their game and should be celebrated, many were equally as poor, and will now be mocked and ridiculed in no particular order.
But first, the Top 10 Winners of the 2004 Olympic Trials….
Winners
10) Michael Johnson, and Jeremy Wariner in the men's 400m. The Baylor NCAA Champ crushed a loaded field in 44.3, with Michael Johnson looking on. After watching an interview with the ever classy Johnson, I became confused- he had none of the sprinter trademarks: arrogance, conceit, tattoos, or trash talking. He couldn't have been very fast in his day…
9) Women's 5k. Props to Shalane for taking it out, and what a race we were treated to. Each one of those three ladies put on a show, as Shalane led, Runyan closed, and then Culpepper scratched and clawed her way to a win. And then the interview- your local high school doesn't have more class.
8) Alan Webb. Incase you missed it, Alan Webb ran the race like he was racing shot putters, toying for 800m before dropping a mid race 55 and making Stember and the rest of the boys look absolutely ridiculous. Not only that, but his "Rebel Yell" only seconds after crossing the finish line captured the passion with which he runs. How could you not love it?
7) Gail Devers, Joanna Hayes, Melissa Morrison, Women's 110H. Thanks to God all around in this post race interview. Despite the fact that I think God might be a bit more concerned with a few other issues, like starving children or world peace- I like seeing the credit get sent above the athletes head to God, rather than the usual: the credit going to their own head because they think they are God.
6) Monique Hennagan. Women's 400m. Former Spring Valley Woman captures the 400m crown. You gotta love the home team, and I'm surprised more people didn't know we had a local celebrity…me included….
5) Dan Brown. Men's 10k. It's hard to believe how good he has gotten virtually with no one noticing. In case you missed it, he is already a member of the Olympic marathon team. Maybe that Salazar guy learned from his mistakes after all. Dan Brown is gradually getting faster and faster each year (see "Wetmore" below for the opposite of "gradual").
4) Daniel Lincoln. Men's Steeple. Did anyone else blink during this race and miss when Lincoln asked Fam if he was ok with Lincoln making everyone else look a bit amateurship over the last two laps?
3) Amy Rudolph- 5k- 4th 1500m- Third. Coming back after seeing her Olympic birth slip away in the 5k, she never looked good and never looked fast, but she churned her way into third place. Her spirit of racing and fighting captures what the Olympic trials are all about.
2) Alan Webb. I feel the need to mention this one more time. If you have not seen it, find some one who has it taped, or find a picture on the internet of his lateral triceps head about to poke you in the eye http://www.mensracing.com/photos/2004/olympictrials04/dayeight40.jpg.
1) Bernard Williams – Men 200m Third place. In the highlight of the meet, Bernard Williams made the team in the 200m, then ran around like he'd won a million bucks, throwing his shoes in the crowd, etc. The guy was genuinely pumped. Then the interview, again, a moment worth getting a copy of…He's an entertainer first?? Haha, that was too good...
Losers
10) David Krummenacker. Nonqualifier and noncompetitor. Was there any worse situation than our best hope in the 800m getting fourth, then when given the chance to run the 1500m, deciding to not even try? Is there a bigger race than that Olympic thing that he is saving himself for?
9) Club Wetmore. Coach of the down and out. After coming to the lime light as one of the premier college coaches with the attitude of pushing the envelope as far as possible, injuries be damned, Coach Mark Wetmore of Colorado has pushed his runners into the most anti-Lydiard state as possible. Lydiard (whom he claims to be a disciple of) was all about gradual physiological adaptation, whereas Wetmore seems to be more about pushing the envelope with injuries. Ritz, Goucher, Torres. They all ran about as well as my golden retriever (she can run six minute miles though). And they all have been NCAA Champions. Wetmore has part of the puzzle figured out, but that part also leaves his guys hurt and without a hope years later. Could anyone really run with a healthy Goucher in 99? Nope. Now, five years later, he's on the verge of retirement. (Ritz did go pro already too).
8) Distance Race Rules/Men's 5k. The rules on who makes the team were so confusing that the announcers were saying congrats to Riley for being on the team for sure in the 5k, when Riley himself was obviously very well educated on the middle schoolish rules and knew that there was a way that only Broe would run (you can look it up and figure it out). Then 3rd placer Bolota Asmerom did not qualify in anyway. Now, as bad as that sucks, no one put the rules into place after the race, so Asmerom and everyone else who thinks he needs to be on the team should stop acting incompetent. The rules were in place. The rules suck. But everyone there had to play by them. Besides, Asmerom's banana hammock was bad enough as it was- we don't need all that going to Athens to represent us…
7) Micheal Stember. Men's 1500m/ Webb's breakfast. Props to Stember for admitting afterwards that Webb was out of his league and that there was no way to beat him, but come on, with all the talking and the 'it's my track' and the stare down in the semi's…if you're gonna do all that, you gotta back it up…(of course, atleast Stember didn't have GOAT tattooed on his arm)…
6) Briana Shook. Women's Steeple. Winning by eight seconds. National Champion. American Record. But she missed the water jump on the first lap. It was her own fault, but you couldn't help feeling bad for her. Maybe the water reminded her of getting hooked by that fisher a few years ago and never being able to get the hook out of her nose…
5) Jason Lunn. Men's 1500m/ Light snack for Webb. Get a life Jason- you got handled out there- and no one cares about your shoe getting spiked.
4) Tim Montgomery- Drug Free Slow Guy. Tim is clean, and now he sucks.
3) Marion Jones- Drug Free Slow Woman. Marion is clean, and now she sucks.
Which makes you wonder- how good are the genetics really going to be for their child? Probably good enough to figure out how to not get caught...
2) NBC/USA. "Slo-Jo" Overcoverage. Despite the fact that there was some good coverage, particularly of the 1500m, how many times must we watch Marion "Slo-Jo" Jones walk around going through withdrawal symptoms?
1) Letsrun.com- Louchini Petition. Offering an online petition to keep Louchini from trying to get the A-standard is classless, tasteless, and everything-else-less. Like I mentioned earlier, the rules were the rules and were in place before the races were run. Nobody up and changed the rules during or after the race. So no one should be expected to choose not to chase their dream. Why else was Louchini there if he was just going to step down anyways? That's absurd (almost as absurd as the rules). And besides, I think Louchini could give us a bit more…uh…coverage than our 3rd place finisher.
And that's how the trials looked to me. I suppose they would have looked a lot better on drugs…
But first, the Top 10 Winners of the 2004 Olympic Trials….
Winners
10) Michael Johnson, and Jeremy Wariner in the men's 400m. The Baylor NCAA Champ crushed a loaded field in 44.3, with Michael Johnson looking on. After watching an interview with the ever classy Johnson, I became confused- he had none of the sprinter trademarks: arrogance, conceit, tattoos, or trash talking. He couldn't have been very fast in his day…
9) Women's 5k. Props to Shalane for taking it out, and what a race we were treated to. Each one of those three ladies put on a show, as Shalane led, Runyan closed, and then Culpepper scratched and clawed her way to a win. And then the interview- your local high school doesn't have more class.
8) Alan Webb. Incase you missed it, Alan Webb ran the race like he was racing shot putters, toying for 800m before dropping a mid race 55 and making Stember and the rest of the boys look absolutely ridiculous. Not only that, but his "Rebel Yell" only seconds after crossing the finish line captured the passion with which he runs. How could you not love it?
7) Gail Devers, Joanna Hayes, Melissa Morrison, Women's 110H. Thanks to God all around in this post race interview. Despite the fact that I think God might be a bit more concerned with a few other issues, like starving children or world peace- I like seeing the credit get sent above the athletes head to God, rather than the usual: the credit going to their own head because they think they are God.
6) Monique Hennagan. Women's 400m. Former Spring Valley Woman captures the 400m crown. You gotta love the home team, and I'm surprised more people didn't know we had a local celebrity…me included….
5) Dan Brown. Men's 10k. It's hard to believe how good he has gotten virtually with no one noticing. In case you missed it, he is already a member of the Olympic marathon team. Maybe that Salazar guy learned from his mistakes after all. Dan Brown is gradually getting faster and faster each year (see "Wetmore" below for the opposite of "gradual").
4) Daniel Lincoln. Men's Steeple. Did anyone else blink during this race and miss when Lincoln asked Fam if he was ok with Lincoln making everyone else look a bit amateurship over the last two laps?
3) Amy Rudolph- 5k- 4th 1500m- Third. Coming back after seeing her Olympic birth slip away in the 5k, she never looked good and never looked fast, but she churned her way into third place. Her spirit of racing and fighting captures what the Olympic trials are all about.
2) Alan Webb. I feel the need to mention this one more time. If you have not seen it, find some one who has it taped, or find a picture on the internet of his lateral triceps head about to poke you in the eye http://www.mensracing.com/photos/2004/olympictrials04/dayeight40.jpg.
1) Bernard Williams – Men 200m Third place. In the highlight of the meet, Bernard Williams made the team in the 200m, then ran around like he'd won a million bucks, throwing his shoes in the crowd, etc. The guy was genuinely pumped. Then the interview, again, a moment worth getting a copy of…He's an entertainer first?? Haha, that was too good...
Losers
10) David Krummenacker. Nonqualifier and noncompetitor. Was there any worse situation than our best hope in the 800m getting fourth, then when given the chance to run the 1500m, deciding to not even try? Is there a bigger race than that Olympic thing that he is saving himself for?
9) Club Wetmore. Coach of the down and out. After coming to the lime light as one of the premier college coaches with the attitude of pushing the envelope as far as possible, injuries be damned, Coach Mark Wetmore of Colorado has pushed his runners into the most anti-Lydiard state as possible. Lydiard (whom he claims to be a disciple of) was all about gradual physiological adaptation, whereas Wetmore seems to be more about pushing the envelope with injuries. Ritz, Goucher, Torres. They all ran about as well as my golden retriever (she can run six minute miles though). And they all have been NCAA Champions. Wetmore has part of the puzzle figured out, but that part also leaves his guys hurt and without a hope years later. Could anyone really run with a healthy Goucher in 99? Nope. Now, five years later, he's on the verge of retirement. (Ritz did go pro already too).
8) Distance Race Rules/Men's 5k. The rules on who makes the team were so confusing that the announcers were saying congrats to Riley for being on the team for sure in the 5k, when Riley himself was obviously very well educated on the middle schoolish rules and knew that there was a way that only Broe would run (you can look it up and figure it out). Then 3rd placer Bolota Asmerom did not qualify in anyway. Now, as bad as that sucks, no one put the rules into place after the race, so Asmerom and everyone else who thinks he needs to be on the team should stop acting incompetent. The rules were in place. The rules suck. But everyone there had to play by them. Besides, Asmerom's banana hammock was bad enough as it was- we don't need all that going to Athens to represent us…
7) Micheal Stember. Men's 1500m/ Webb's breakfast. Props to Stember for admitting afterwards that Webb was out of his league and that there was no way to beat him, but come on, with all the talking and the 'it's my track' and the stare down in the semi's…if you're gonna do all that, you gotta back it up…(of course, atleast Stember didn't have GOAT tattooed on his arm)…
6) Briana Shook. Women's Steeple. Winning by eight seconds. National Champion. American Record. But she missed the water jump on the first lap. It was her own fault, but you couldn't help feeling bad for her. Maybe the water reminded her of getting hooked by that fisher a few years ago and never being able to get the hook out of her nose…
5) Jason Lunn. Men's 1500m/ Light snack for Webb. Get a life Jason- you got handled out there- and no one cares about your shoe getting spiked.
4) Tim Montgomery- Drug Free Slow Guy. Tim is clean, and now he sucks.
3) Marion Jones- Drug Free Slow Woman. Marion is clean, and now she sucks.
Which makes you wonder- how good are the genetics really going to be for their child? Probably good enough to figure out how to not get caught...
2) NBC/USA. "Slo-Jo" Overcoverage. Despite the fact that there was some good coverage, particularly of the 1500m, how many times must we watch Marion "Slo-Jo" Jones walk around going through withdrawal symptoms?
1) Letsrun.com- Louchini Petition. Offering an online petition to keep Louchini from trying to get the A-standard is classless, tasteless, and everything-else-less. Like I mentioned earlier, the rules were the rules and were in place before the races were run. Nobody up and changed the rules during or after the race. So no one should be expected to choose not to chase their dream. Why else was Louchini there if he was just going to step down anyways? That's absurd (almost as absurd as the rules). And besides, I think Louchini could give us a bit more…uh…coverage than our 3rd place finisher.
And that's how the trials looked to me. I suppose they would have looked a lot better on drugs…